Uncovering Red Flags

Since 2013 when I started reaching out to singles on life and relationship matters, I have had the privilege of listening to different dating experiences of theirs.  A lot of them disclosed their encounters regarding red flags in their past relationships. The married folks I have also counselled confided that they knowingly entered into marriages with partners with toxic character traits. From these interactions, one conclusion is crystal clear; people are more often than not aware that their partners are exhibiting certain untoward characteristics.

Each passing time, I would feel this unshakable stir in my spirit to deconstruct ‘Red Flags in Relationships,’ from a purely different perspective, due to my observations from relating with single and married folks. I reckon a handful of authors have written interesting pieces on the common dimensions of red flags (which are easy to talk about), such as anger, cheating, selfishness, disrespect, etc. All the same, I feel there is more to be explored on the subject. I mean, deep insights into the true foundational issues or generational patterns behind those traits.

There are categories of red flags that a lot of individuals are blind to. It is funny how folks still argue if generational patterns reoccur or not. They cannot get past the fact that certain patterns have been modelled by their parents or guardians, and as such, stored in their minds as a way of reacting to a given situation. Certain behaviours are triggered by spiritual manipulations and generational patterns. In other cases, the void or rejection that people have suffered (in their tender years), causes them to exhibit particular negative character traits.