Going through a heartbreak is not an easy task to pull; it can be very draining and overwhelming. Flashing back through memories that you built together can plunge you into a profound sense of sadness, and it requires a concerted effort to lift yourself out of that emotional abyss with the help of the right support system. I’ve been there and trust me, it’s not a great place to be.

The aftermath leaves you feeling anxious and jittery, your heart racing at the slightest trigger. Your mind remains unstable, your belly rumbling, and an outward expression that betrays the weight of your past experiences.

Suffering heartbreak extends beyond a relationship call-off; it can also manifest in the form of a betrayal within a marriage. Perhaps you may have stumbled on some chats, caught your spouse red-handed, or just been suspicious. You may also have gone through a big argument with your spouse or best friend. Whichever the case may be, it is not an easy ride but you can overcome the pain.

So, here are a few ways to deal with the pain that you are faced with daily:

  1. Don’t deny your pain; be honest with yourself and admit your current reality.

This is the truth; you cannot keep pretending that you are fine. You are hurt and your mind must realise this. Be truthful with yourself, as it serves as the starting point for finding healing and inner peace.

  1. Begin to reshape the meaning in your mind as your brain doesn’t know the difference between imagination and reality.

I know you may find yourself thinking about all the beautiful memories you both shared, while at it, also consciously envision a life filled with hope and new possibilities. By doing so, you can gradually shift your mindset and embrace the potential for the happiness that lies ahead.

  1. Stay in a circle of positive and funny people. You need a strong support system.

This is not the time to be isolated. I know that you may think it is better to keep your issue to yourself or avoid everyone.

Sincerely, withdrawal only worsens your situation; you need to talk to someone who understands what you are going through. This can be a counsellor or a friend that you trust. Connect and speak with someone who can make you feel relieved and human.

  1. Watch some comedies or funny movies in between your breaks.

Sometimes, you need to divert your attention and immerse yourself in the laughter-inducing world of movies and skits.

Just go ahead and expose yourself to content that can uplift your spirit and bring about genuine laughter.

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: But a broken drieth the bones (Proverbs 17:22 KJV).

  1. Pray for strength.

You can ask the Lord to strengthen you this season so that you don’t lose your emotional stamina.

Each day, wake up with the intention to experience the healing power of the Lord.

  1. Journal down how you feel.

This is a good time to journal your feelings. If you bottle them up, they would eat you up. Take your time daily to let out how you feel.

  1. Affirm yourself.

This is a powerful way of speaking positively to yourself. Your mind needs to constantly see that you are valuable and worthy.

Write out positive words and confess them daily till they become your reality. Let your mind meditate on the fun times you’ve experienced in your life.

  1. Don’t lose hope.

Believe that there’s a better future; give yourself some time to heal gradually. As you go through the journey of healing, you will become better and stronger equipped to confront the issues you face.

  1. Evaluate yourself and the relationship.

While you may be grieving the betrayal you suffered, you must evaluate the dynamics of the relationship you were in.

Reflect on the reason that initially drew you into that relationship. Examine the events that unfolded and the lessons they taught you. Consider what you could have done differently and identify the red flags you may have ignored. Helping yourself understand these can make it easier to realise that better days will come.

This process of self-reflection would also help you gain a deeper understanding of your own needs and desires, as well as recognise warning signs that may emerge in future relationships.

This, in itself, would provide solace by reminding you that all will be well.

  1. Pick your lessons.

At the end of every episode, lessons are waiting to be discovered. What are your lessons? What are the joys of that relationship? Who did you become?

Picking a few things that you are grateful for can change your perspective. What if God was saving you from something worse? Be grateful for your journey.

  1. Seek therapy.

You will need to engage in therapy to have a professional bearing on what you went through.

Perhaps, you do not have the resilience to follow through with these tips, don\’t fret, a professional will help you deal with the issues better and keep you accountable.

If you would like to speak about this, you can send an email to

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *